There are several outrageously foolish characters in the Bible. That should perhaps come as no surprise, since one of the main purposes of any (good) religious system is to provide its adherents the superior wisdom to lead a most-successful and honorable life. So, of course, one of the best ways to show up a competing (bad) religious system is to depict its adherents as utter fools. Completely devoid of wisdom. In a word, stupid.
In my last blog, I discussed the Rich Fool who Jesus satirizes in his parable at Luke 12:13-21. This dolt finds himself at wits’ end, pacing endlessly to and fro trying to figure out what to do with all his extra wealth…that is until God suddenly shows out of nowhere to claim his life and take an accounting of what he’s done with his good fortune. Whoops!
There’s a character - actually two of ‘em! - who are even dumber. They’re the guys who in Isaiah 44:9-22 make idols.
We’re not talking here about the kind of idol makers who turn nobodies into superstars. Those idol makers are notoriously sly, seductive, maybe even dangerous when you’re caught in their lair.
The idol makers the prophet Isaiah describes in Chapter 44 are nothing like that. In fact, they are pretty much nothing at all. At least when it comes to the “brains” department.
When seeking contemporary counterparts to Isaiah’s idol makers, one need sniff no further than arguably the two most popular fools of modern times — Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne, more commonly known as “Dumb and Dumber”, from the movie of the same name.
Dumb and Dumber was a huge hit the moment it hit the theaters. Audiences couldn’t get enough of the punchlines that surprise and delight because the brains that utter them are SO dim.
For example - from the trailer - as the Harry and Lloyd desperately seek to figure out the name of the owner a briefcase they’re hoping to return, Lloyd remembers being once told the name of the owner is usually written somewhere on the outside of the case. Of course! The name of the owner of this briefcase must be… Samsonite!
It’s almost embarrassing how dopey the humor is. Roger Ebert gave the film only 2 stars. Even as he admitted several times laughing uncontrollably.
And all that brings us to…Isaiah 44 and the two fools described there.
First, the ironsmith at vs. 12. We told he “fashions (his idol) and works it over the coals, shaping it with hammers, and forging it with his strong arm.” Oh my, what a show of fortitude and brawn! That is, until “he becomes hungry and his strength fails, he drinks no water and is faint.” Whaat? Doesn’t he have smarts enough to pace himself, take a break from time to time so he can complete his task? Nope! For whatever reason he refuses to notice he’s got a problem and mindlessly lets the problem take over.
Sort of reminds me of this iconic Dumb scene:
Even dumber is the carpenter whose boobery begins at vs. 13 and goes on for several verses.
First we’re told the painstaking, exquisite care the carpenter gives to crafting his idol. It’s “perfectly drawn in order to be given perfectly crafted form. “ He “stretches a line, marks it out with a stylus, fashions it with planes and marks it with a compass.” Not only that, but “he makes it in human form, with human beauty, to be set up as a shrine.” He’s so conscientious an artiste that he plants the tree that he will use and waits for the rain to nourish it so at the perfect moment he can cut it down.
But then his brain apparently suddenly shuts down. ”Part of (the wood) he takes and warms himself.” And then with part of it he creates a slab and “he bakes bread…with half of it he burns in the fire to roast meat.” And then he kicks back and says “Ah, I am warm, I can feel the fire!”
We’re told FINALLY he gets around to making his god out of the wood that remains. Invariably that means something eeked out of leftover remnants, only enough to make an object small and unremarkable.
Nevertheless, after dinner he “bows down to it and worships it; he prays to it and says, ‘Save me, for you are my god!’ “
How could someone so impressively intent on accomplishing the extraordinary suddenly give up his project at the moment he could have soared, sacrifice the wood he’d painstakingly prepared to the most mundane of pursuits, and pretty much end up, idol-wise, with nothing? Even as he still really thinks it’s something?
In many ways it’s akin to the climactic moment (or should we say unbelievably unclimactic moment) when Lloyd and Harry, after taking a cross country trip in search of beautiful women and the beautiful life, receive the most amazing of gifts that falls right in their laps (as it were). Dreams are about to become true! And yet….
What makes Dumb & Dumber so memorable, and entertaining, is its revelry in over-the-top 110% brainlessness. The same is true for the idol makers in Isaiah 44. However, while Harry and Lloyd are sweet, lovable imbeciles, the same can’t be said of the biblical pair. They’re just, in the end, total duds.
What is their purpose in Isaiah 44 besides engendering guffaws of the spit-take variety?
My guess is that they’re part of the good news being proclaimed at this point in Isaiah’s prophetic opus. It’s just been announced that the Israelites — who had been subject to painful exile in multi-god, idol-drenched Babylon — are now getting to go home, complements of the Persian emperor Cyrus (the Bible’s first messiah btw).
By Chapter 44 the once-seemingly invincible Babylonian Empire was now broken. And as an act of ultimate nose-thumbing the Isaiah looks back at Babylonian religious culture and describes it as nothing but dumb. Not dangerous or insidious or seductive. Or even bad. To label something as such is still to give it power. There is no there there here.
And maybe that’s the best way for all of us to keep our idols and temptations at bay. Give them the Farrelly Brother (and/or biblical equivalent to the Farrelly Brothers) treatment as we thumb our noses and move on. And get smart.
